I watched "Walk the Line", "The Terminal" and some Sex and the City last night, among doing other things like... going over my script for Violet. All three I liked... although "The Terminal" was kind of... silly.

Ok, so I bought one of those 4 gallon cheap ice cream things and this was a really bad idea because I can't stop eating it. My freshman year during the first week of "spring", all I ate was ice cream for that ENTIRE week. It was a good week...

As I was watching SATC I realized something: I am not a memorable girlfriend. You know why? Because I didn't screw any of my boyfriends up mentally. I have, however, been "the girl after" in my last two relationships. The cool, nice girl who gets to deal with all the problems that these OTHER girls created. First it was Hillary, then Becky... and it just seems so unfair that these losers threw something really great away because they were still obsessed with some girl who totally messed them up. Well, *I* want to be remembered! I want to be the one that every other girl has to be compared to. I want to be the one who is talked about so much with new girlfriend that she knows every stupid thing about me without ever having met me. But... I can't. Because I am not a bitch... and I'm too nice to screw someone up.

Maybe I should just stop dating guys who have been screwed up by their past relationships... because it is starting to screw ME up. Well.... maybe that was the plan all along. They got screwed up by some girl, so they'll screw up another girl to "get even with the world." I'm just.. not AS screwed up as these guys have been. Perhaps I am stronger... yeah... that's what I'd like to think it is.

It just sucks that you have to be the awful one to be remembered...

We have rehearsal in like... an hour. I'm a little scared.